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In this post we will be sharing our top 10 tips for successfully flirting by text with a girl in order to build up her attraction towards you and clearing the way to getting her out on a date.
Knowing how to flirt with a girl by text is one of the most important skills you master in order to make a girl want to get to know you, and to keep her on the hook and interested in you.
Girls like guys who are fun and who interest them, simple. And guys who flirt are interesting and fun. Unfortunately, you can’t always be there to flirt with her face to face, and that’s where texting comes in.
Flirting by text is a skill which can be learned and mastered pretty easily by anyone, and, as with just about every other skill there’s a right way, and a wrong way to go about it, and so if you start out using bad habits, and trashy pick up lines ,in your text flirting they will grow and be much harder to break free of farther down the line.
And when you consider that any bad habits you do allow to develop can mean the difference between having a date this weekend, and not having a date this weekend, or at any time in the foreseeable future, it’s just not worth running the risk.
Although when you’re just getting to know a girl, even though messaging by text shouldn’t be your main type of communicating with her, in today’s digital dating world it’s something that you’re just going to have to do, and so the more you know and the better you are at flirting by text, the sooner you’ll be able to get her out on a date.
Before we get into our top 20 tips for flirting by text there is one vital piece of advice we’d like to give you, and that is…
Be Unique…
It’s no use whatsoever sending her the same boring texts she’s received a hundred times before from guys who have tried to date her. Ignore this one important point and she’ll just get bored and bin you off like she did with them. So, be unique.
If you feel this is something that’s easier said than done and you don’t have a clue where or how to begin, don’t worry, help is at hand, and you can find out where to get some expert advice on what to text her, when to text her, and how to text her by clicking here…
That said, here are 20 tips that will make flirting by text infinitely easier with practice…
20 Tips for Text Flirting By Text…
# 1. Getting Started- Initiate The Conversation And Be Sure To Listen To Her…
Don’t wait for her to start the conversation. If you do she’ll more than likely see you as being weak and that’s not what you want at all. Like it or not, you’re the man and it’s up to you to start the conversation. It’s what she expects, that’s just how it is.
Once you’ve started the conversation, listen to what she has to say. Sure, girls like it when a guy takes the lead, but they also like it when a guy lets them lead the way up to a point.
By listening to her you will get plenty of ideas of things to chat about, which will not only stop you running out of things to say, but also show her that you’re actually interested in her.
Just make sure you don’t overdo it and come across as some sort of control freak, if you do she’ll just block you.
This is particularly important if you’re trying to get your ex back via text messaging.
# 2. Play it Cool…
Always remember that the majority of girls out there are attracted to guys who are assertive but not desperate so when it comes to flirting by text don’t get carried away, just play it cool and don’t over-text her.
Limit the number of messages you send her, no matter how much you want to get with her, play it cool and play the long game. It will pay off massively in the end.
Also, keep things fun and don’t pressure her. Send her a hilarious joke or two every now and then and make her smile. This way she will look forward to your messages and be more ready and excited to engage in conversation with you.
# 3. Be Unpredictable…
Being boring and predictable is pretty much the worst thing you can do when it comes to flirting by text. If your messages aren’t fun, flirty and interesting, then the best thing you can do, until you come up with something that is, would be to not bother texting her at all.
Text conversations which begin with ‘Hi’, ‘Hey ;). Or ‘How’s your day going’ are simply going to bore the ass off of her and leave you pretty much dead in the water. Every guy she’s ever given her number to has probably sent her those kinds of message, and if they worked it’s highly likely she’d be dating one of them right now and not texting you.
So, you need to do something to make yourself unique, and make yourself stand out from all the others. So, text her something which incentivises, or better still, compels her to reply.
To find out how to do this like a top pick-up artist, click here…
# 4. Use Emoticons…
Emoticons are pretty good for flirting by text as they can help get across lots of different emotions really easily. This is useful as text messages can often be misinterpreted, and so adding an emoticon here and there can help avoid any awkwardness and confusion.
Just remember to only use them when they are relevant, and don’t go overboard and begin throwing them in on every text you send her or you may be running the risk of coming across as either juvenile, or a bit of a clown, and not the man she is looking for.
# 5. Ask Her Questions…
Girls just love the opportunity to talk about themselves when they’re chatting with guys, so as part of your flirting by text strategy, be sure to ask her about her favourite hobbies, films, music, foods, travel destinations, tv shows, etc.
This is another opportunity for you to gather information about her that will help you to organize dates with her, stop the conversation from drying up, and also give you little titbits which you can use to tease her a little…
# 6. Tease Her A Little…
Teasing is great for flirting by text as it’s a pretty sure fire way of creating intimacy between you and your girl without things getting too serious, too soon.
Be careful here though and remember, there is a line and you don’t want to cross it and start being rude or offensive. Cross this line and it’s sudden death for your texting relationship.
Something simple like giving her a cute nickname like ‘dimples’ or ‘little miss bossy boots’, things that nobody else calls her, is a pretty good way to tease her without crossing the line and being offensive.
Or, you could tease her about something she did or said the last time you spent time together, or when you first met. This is called ‘call-back humor’ as it draws attention back to a previous occasion when you had fun together, and is a great way of making her think of you, and your relationship in a positive light.
# 7. Get Suggestive…
Getting suggestive sooner rather than later in your flirting by text relationship serves two important purposes, first it keeps thing interesting, and second, it stops you from getting friend zoned by her.
It’s pretty easy to do too. You can either go down the traditional route in which case you could ask her what she’s wearing, and then pay her a sexy compliment like “ I love the way you look in that dress, but I think I’d love what’s underneath it a whole lot more”…
Or you could try a different approach where you take an innocent comment she makes and ‘accidentally on purpose’ misinterpret it as being sexual.
For example, if she says something like ‘ I couldn’t believe how big it was’, (innocently referring to the size of a meal or something just as everyday) you could reply by saying ‘that’s what she said’…
Simple, fun and flirty without going over the top…
Or if going down the sexting route makes you a little nervous, just drop it into the conversation that you just got out of the shower and you need to dry off. That will get her imagining you wet and naked and put the ball in her court. If she replies in a flirtatious and sexual way, you know you’re both on the same page.
# 8. Create Some Sexual Tension Early On
A common mistake among a lot of men is thinking that they need to wait until much later in the texting relationship to start building some sexual tension. This absolutely is not the case, in fact it’s how around 43% of guys end up getting themselves relegated to the dreaded friend zone.
So, just how soon should you start creating sexual tension with her during your flirting by text conversation?
You should do it right of the bat…straight away…immediately!
The trick is to do it in a fun and playful way. And a guy who comes across as being in-tune and comfortable with his sexuality is something which women find very sexy, whereas a guy who comes across as being desperate, seedy, and creepy isn’t.
A really good way to start creating some sexual tension is by deliberately on purpose misinterpreting her comments, as previously mentioned, only taking it a little bit further and making it a little bit sexier.
For example, say you’ve arranged to meet up with her a bar or somewhere, you arrive on time and there’s no sign of her. Your phone beeps and it’s a text from her saying ‘I’m coming’…
To which you could reply saying, ‘I love it when that happens…’
# 9. Don’t Let Her Become Bored…
If there’s one thing you need to keep in mind at all times when flirting by text with women it’s that they get bored, and they get bored fast. There’s no avoiding this fact, so the sooner you come to terms with it, the easier you’ll find it to text a girl effectively.
The thing is, when a lot of guys are texting a woman they forget that the conversations that they are having need to be leading somewhere, ideally towards landing a date with her and actually meeting up. What happens then is, they’re having such a good time texting her, making her laugh and getting her to reply, that they just keep doing what they’re doing over and over, as if they don’t want to jeopardize what little they have got going on with her.
Carry on like this and sooner or later she’s going to get bored with this and you will end up being dumped in the dreaded friend zone.
So, whatever you do, don’t let her become bored, remember to keep things moving forward. Focus on moving from flirting by text to speaking to her on the phone, and then from phone conversations to going on a date, and from going on a date to getting her into bed.
# 10. Compliment Her…
Women love compliments, but they have to be genuine, because women also have a uncanny way of spotting a fake compliment a mile off…
So, one of the first things, if not the first thing you need to do when you text a girl is to serve her up a really nice and genuine compliment.
It really doesn’t matter what you compliment her about, it could be her fantastic personality, her beauty, how smart, or how hardworking she is, anything at all just as long as you are totally honest, genuine and sincere about what you say.
A word of warning here…whatever you decide to compliment her about, steer well clear of telling her how ‘hot’ she is or anything like that. Chances are if you go down that route too soon she’s going to feel uncomfortable at best, used at worst, and run like hell away from you…
Save compliments like this until you are in a serious relationship, you really don’t want to blow things at this stage!
# 11. Keep Your Messages Short And To The Point…
When you’re looking for the right way to text a girl, there is something pretty important you need to know…
It’s called the three line rule…
And if you’ve never heard of it, here it is in a nutshell…
Basically, if you are sending her long and drawn out text messages, all you will end up doing is boring her to tears really quickly. You will also come across as being way too eager and lacking in self-confidence too.
You do not want to do this!
So, be sure to keep your messages short and sweet, and to the point.
This is the right way to text a girl, and anyone who is successful at flirting with a woman by text, simply sticks rigidly to the three line rule.
# 12. Be Yourself…
Before you even think of trying it, remember that acting is hard work, there’s just too much to remember, and if you attempt to act like someone that you’re not to try and please a girl, sooner or later you will slip up, she will find out, and that will be the end of that!
So, just be yourself and steer well clear of trying to be someone that you are not.
Also remember, the whole point of flirting by text is to move things forward to eventually meeting up with her. She is going to want to meet the guy she believes has been texting her, so whatever you do, don’t put on an act…it WILL come back to bite you in the ass!
The bottom line here is that girls simply don’t go for building relationships on lies and dishonesty…
And let’s face it, who can blame them?
# 13. Don’t Be Pushy-Never Text Her Again Before Getting A Reply…
However much you think the stuff you text a girl requires an immediate response, the fact is that it probably doesn’t, at least not from her point of view…
And just because she doesn’t get back to you right away doesn’t mean that she doesn’t like you, or that she’s ignoring you, or anything like that.
So, before you bombard her with more texts, give her the time she needs to read your text and just wait for her to reply. Don’t be pushy, instead show her how patient you are, don’t come across as being needy and insecure.
# 14. Don’t Overdo The Emojis…
Texting is a language just like any other and one in which it’s easy for things to get lost in translation and misinterpreted. One way of getting around this is to use emojis. These little icons help to get across the intended emotion behind what is being said clearer than a simple text message can do alone.
The only problem is that some guys overdo them and depend on them too much to get their message across, and too many emojis can end up being very annoying.
So, you need to show a girl that you can actually use words to convey what you’re trying to say to her, and also that you do actually have something to say, and so, when you do use emojis, don’t overdo them, limit yourself to only using 3 or 4 per conversation.
# 15. Don’t Send Her 1 Word Replies…
This one is for you if you happen to be a man of few words…
If you’re flirting by text with a girl and when she messages you and asks you something for instance and you respond with only one or two word answers, chances are you’re going to soon end up coming across as unenthusiastic and very boring too.
So, when you text a girl back, put some effort in, remember the 3 line rule, you don’t need to go overboard but you do need to be invested in the conversation. Otherwise she could begin to feel like her text messages are annoying you, which could very easily end up with her giving up on texting you because it just isn’t any fun for her.
If you struggle to come up with the right messages to send her, go to this page now and see how you can overcome this quickly, easily and permanently…
# 16. Always End Your Messages With A Question…
Ending your text messages with a question is a fantastic way to keep the conversation, and the flirting going as it encourages her to text you back.
Text messages that just end without a question can kill the conversation dead no matter how much fun the conversation has been up to that point.
So, be fun, be flirty, be naughty, just make sure you texts interest her enough to illicit a reply from her…
You also need to know when to end the conversation too and we’ll be covering that further down this page.
# 17. Don’t Text Her Late At Night…
Generally, texting a girl in the middle of the night means just one thing…
But if you’re texting a girl you just met and really only just getting to know her, and she’s not the one texting you late at night, don’t think that you have to be the one who does it.
This is because unless she’s previously said that it’s OK to text her late at night, you have no idea how she will respond, or even if she’ll start to see you as a nuisance and stop responding to you altogether.
So, just relax and play it cool, let her be the one to text you late at night, and if she doesn’t, don’t sweat it, just wait until the next morning.
# 18. Use Good Grammar…
When flirting by text you want to come across as being witty and intelligent, which just isn’t going to happen if you’re ‘txtin lyk dis’. Sure, if you’re a kid who’s under 18 you’ll probably get away with it, but if you’re a grown man in conversation with a woman you need to pay more attention to your spelling and grammar in general.
Spell out your words properly, and don’t use numbers instead of letters. You’ll just come across as lazy, juvenile, and unintelligent if you do. Women are attracted to men, not boys.
This doesn’t mean you need to sound as though you’ve just swallowed a dictionary and start using big words to impress her. All you need to do is read through each of your text messages before you send them and make sure there are no spelling mistakes or anything like that.
Using punctuation can add some real feeling to your texts and have a massive impact on how she interprets them. Say, for example, she send you a pic of herself in a new dress or outfit, and she looks pretty hot…saying ‘wow!’ conveys far more enthusiasm than just a plain old ‘wow’, and saying ‘I like it…’ comes across as being much more flirty, and suggestive than just saying ‘I like it’, see the difference, subtle but very effective.
Just one thing…don’t go overboard with the exclamation points and question marks etc…or with the winky faces, smiley faces and other emojis. It’s far more effective to use them sparingly and in the right context, otherwise they just come across as juvenile.
# 19. Don’t Allow Her To Manipulate You…
Some women know all too well the effect they have on men and will readily use their sex appeal to manipulate them. They do this to test men, to see if they can keep themselves together and composed when they start to turn things sexual…
And, most men fail this test…!
Once a woman turns things sexual with them they get over excited, over eager, a turn into lapdogs…do allow her to manipulate you like this, if you do you’ll be showing her that you’re no different to every other guy out there who is trying to get with her.
So, keep an eye out for if she starts coming on strong and turning things sexual, and if and when it happens just remember that this could be a test…
Instead of falling for it and allowing yourself to get all over excited, think of it as the game that it is. Playful banter works well here, tell her that you’re “not that easy ;-)”, or that she’ll have to do something like buying you a drink, or performing some other similar small task for you before anything happens.
This gets her thinking that you’re used to beautiful women being sexual and coming on to you, and that she’s going to have to try a bit harder. Once she knows that it’s no big deal to you, you’ll immediately stand out from the majority of the other guys she’s tested and failed.
# 20. Know When To End The Conversation…
One of the most important skills to learn when flirting by text is when to end a conversation.
If text conversations are allowed to go on for too long, sooner or later you will end up running out of interesting and fun things to say and as a result things will become very awkward and very boring, very quickly…
So, you need to be able to end your text conversations before they reach that point, and leave her wanting more.
This is pretty easy to do, just end the conversation with something teasing or flirty like “gotta go now babe, I’ll text you tomorrow. Don’t go getting in too much trouble without me!”…
Or “It’s time for bed…I need my beauty sleep. See you in your dreams”!
Try to end with something cute and flirty like “gotta go, babe, I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Don’t get into too much trouble without me!” or “Time for bed – need to get my beauty sleep. See you in your dreams!”
Over To You…
So there you have our top 20 tips for successfully flirting with girls by text. These should help you to formulate a plan for flirting by text which keeps things fun and flirty, as well as moving forward to calling her on the phone and arranging a date, while preventing you from developing bad text flirting habits that may be difficult to break and also slow down your progress.
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